On Looking Back

It’s commonly said that we are used to living either in the future, or the past. And it’s also commonly said when it is used to make a point; a point about how we are not living in the present fully.

Personally, I don’t think there is anything wrong in looking back. It seems to me that when people make remarks as such, they are referring to regrets. But the past is not just that; there is more to it than that.

Looking to the past enables us to remember happy events. The birthday surprises we share with other people, the one-too-many drunken a nights that we unexpectedly embarked on from saying ‘yes’ too much, the somber nights that we’ve had with crisps being our sole companion for the night. The past represents our memories of positively charged events in our lives — the events where we’ll look back on.

When we look back on these events, we are not lamenting on how our lives are mundane now. Rather, we choose to be reminded that there are only many opportunities as such to come. As long as we keep our minds open, our hearts welcoming, and our hope, strong.

Looking to the past enables us to remember the mistakes we have made, the missed opportunities to say ‘Hello’ to someone we found interesting, the clumsy falls that we’ve had from being too cocky with our biking abilities. The past encompasses all the learnings that we could potentially have.

When we look back on these events, we are not choosing to dwell on regrets — all the ‘should haves’. Rather, we choose to be reminded that these so-called negatively charged events represent what we value. For we are only feeling bad for having done all these things because they are far from what we envision our ideal-selves to have done. They remind us of who are our ideal-selves are; and motivates us to walk closer to that, no matter how difficult they may be.

Looking to the past, we are reminded of how Lady Fortune works. Perhaps she favours you; or she may not. But either ways, you are reminded of what is in your control — and what isn’t. This, hopefully, serves as a reminder of the role of randomness in our lives.

Looking to the past, we are reminded of time. That time passes quickly when we are happy, slowly when we are sad, and more seemingly quick as we age. And hopefully, this reminds us that as we age, we not only have quicker time, but also lesser time left in our lives.

Looking to the past, we are reminded that we have lived through many unmemorable days. For the days that we no longer fully remember; let them serve as a reminder that we should be living life to the extent where if we were to leave this earth right now, let that be the last thing we say, do, and embody.